hindering the entire organization

So I've been thinking about taking the ferry from Bellingham to Alaska because I've never been to Alaska and it seems like a cool thing to say I've done. Like seeing the Get Up Kids in concert (it may actually be as boring as seeing the Get Up Kids in concert). Only I wanted to go in September and then totally forgot about it.

So now it's October and getting colder and I still want to go. It's like 36 hours to Ketchikan, but there is no way to get to anywhere FROM Ketchikan so I think I'm gonna have to go to Juneau and fly back. It's like 60 hours to Juneau and while I could catch up with a lot of reading in 60 hours, I think I could get a LOT of writing done. Without distractions and 2 1/2 days to just hang out I think I could be very productive.

So I asked for the time off and I'm hoping it gets approved.

I'm sure I'd rather just hang out at home and play Xbox too, but I have to figure out if I'm going to write or just say I'm going to write when I get more time or less depressed. It makes a kind of expensive vacation for a place without beaches or gambling, but if I can figure out this writing thing it will be worth it.

If nothing else I could totally write about a ferry ride that goes bad. THAT would be a movie I'd want to see.

Like a year ago there was a rumor going around that one of the library kids was dead. Turned out not to be true. We found out like 3 days later which is a weird time frame to determine if someone was actually not alive or not.

I guess yesterday a different library kid went in for surgery and never came out. None of this bullshit "I think he's dead but maybe not" stuff. Like actually pronounced by doctors and everything.

Again it wasn't a kid I knew overly well. He kind of hung around on the outskirts of the library scene. But he was always super nice to me and everyone else he knew. Always smiling and welcoming and never into any drama or the petty grudges library kids seem to incite. A wise older soul and I will definitely miss him. He was one of the good ones.

The pseudo-death of the other kid was surprising (if the circumstances weren't) and abrupt, but the real thing was a brutal kick in the stomach for me and I'm really concerned for what the kids are feeling. It's gonna be rough.

The one bright spot is that 2 of my kids came in this morning to tell me and make sure I was ok. I asked the same thing of them. They said they were going to walk around town making sure everyone was dealing with it and be back later where we could make an announcement at teen programming today.

I've never been able to deal with death very well. So this sucks might be the best I can do. But this really sucks. I'll miss you Day-vo.

There was a time in my job where we were the best (or second best) library at attracting teens. Then Mukilteo got in the act and started doing 11 programs a month and attracted three hundreds of kids and I stopped looking as awesome. We're now third and in striking distance of second. I told the Roommate that if I can get all my kids out of rehab or jail we'd be ready to make a push for second place.

Today I didn't really feel like going into work and I certainly don't feel like being here without the succor of ice cream, but I didn't actively hate the idea. Also a bunch of my kids came in to talk to me and Lil Jonny Urine loved Looking for Alaska as is doing some kind of project on John Green because of me.

So I made a difference. Also some girl asked where I got my eyebow pierced and I told her to look up the teen who did it. I also told her it hurt and bled alot though, so I'm not sure if she will.

The dude who comes in to sleep and look at pr0n (in reverse order, because all the porning tuckers him out) told me that one of the kids in the teen area had their shoes off. It was all I could do not to look at him and say, "Really? YOU'RE complaining about behavior issues in the library? Go back to sleep, porny!"

No closer to going to Barcelona, seeing the Setup, being on the Amazing Race, or much of anything else. I went to Canada yesterday though. And tomorrow I get to go to Everett library for book discussions. And I get to talk about the teen project on Thursday. So yay for field trips.

Amazing Race was bad. I got up early to go to Muckleshoot with the Prospect and when we got there we found out: we had not bought DVDs to transfer our audition video onto, we needed pictures and proof of passport which we did not have, we were in a long line, and basically had wasted the previous and upcoming 3 hours. So we went home and I went to sleep. It was kinda sad for me but really sad for the roommate who was really looking forward to something to look forward to.

I also went to Snoqualmie, met the guitar hero, won 60 bucks at poker, and had a really good time with a CSG. I'm glad she bullied me into going. Love the casino, love making fun of Amish Seizure and Tear-Stained Elevator Shoes even more. I still think Double Shot of Ska-lua is an ok band name though.

I guess there are people I can go to Barcelona with, but I'm still not in contact with them. Looks like it should still happen though.

Just gotta get through 4 more hours and I'll be happier.

I read the reviews of Kandyland and am sort of sorry I missed it (especially since the alternative was sitting around with librarians getting yelled at). There aren't a LOT of reviews but the ones that are are favorable and it seems like the music wasn't as assy as I thought it would be. I'm always jealous when someone writes about the Djs playing so good everyone there starts dancing. I generally like that kind of music. I don't much like Trance, but they said they were dropping trance anthems and I generally like that.

Crackerjack dropped nothing but anthems in their set at Broken Hearts and it was fantastic. Pirates is this weekend though and Frankie Bones is playing (he invented PLUR). I'm very curious to see what that set is going to be like.

Worked yesterday so today is a bit of a kick in the teeth. But I'm off tomorrow (watching Resident Evil: Degeneration and Be77er Living through Circuitry for my teens... which is kinda like work) and game day Wednesday (alt county and Jimmy Eat World sets) and off Friday so I'll survive. Except I'm prolly not off Friday if I'm going to WASHYARG.

But I don't have to think about things till Wednesday. That's the kind of attitude that gets me in trouble around here and gets me yelled at at after hours social events.

I had to read a book about Canada and hockey and teenage abortion last night and this week I have to read about Cystic Fibrosis. Yay. I don't mind depressing YA as long as it is well written, but I will have to take a break to read something a bit more plot heavy. Possibly involving wide scale destruction of some kind.

Employee recognition breakfast is next week and I feel a little weird about not being recognized. You know since I had the biggest library program ever this year and I got recognized last year. Not that I've lived up to my billing lately, but I could make a case for recognition. At least this means the weird picture they took of me last year where I'm looking off to the side like I was distracted (or possibly envisioning new teen programs) is being taken down.

So ready to be done with work this week and of course I have a retirement thing to go to. I wouldn't have even bothered but the two pages asked if I was going and told me to save them seats. I just want to go home and do nothing more strenuous than virtually blowing up tanks or reading recaps of Idol while watching. Unfortunately I decided to be human about work people and my strange bonds with teenagers I work with.

I'm also not going raving tonight. I didn't buy a presale last month because I was unsure of the lineup and it turned out the lineup is assy. Oh wait, that's Getting Lucky where the headliner is A*S*Y*S. Like I said, assy. Anyway then they added a hardcore stage and it's at the King Cat which is a venue I love when there isn't a secret VIP stage hidden in the back. And Orbit said he was going. And I've tried to see Kzar like 3 times since Tribute and haven't done it.

But in the end I just don't feel like working, then doing socializing, THEN getting kandied up to go out. It feels like an obligation. This will be only the 2nd time I've missed a biggish rave (though the jury's out on how big it will actually be with Bounce last weekend and Pirates next Friday) this year by choice. And both times have been in the last couple months. I think I'm pretty much getting to be done with this phase. Still want to go out and dance, still am comforted by putting on kandi, still enjoy creating a persona that totally isn't me, still enjoy the freedom and youth and belonging and knowledge of the scene.

Had a long involved discussion with the Roommate last night about why it was that I had a graduate degree and still got ONE complete weekend off a month. I still find that completely ridiculous.

I think I'm done with Bill Simmons. He proposed to be upset about the Supersonics move to OK City and mentioned it in all his columns and whatnot. This week he interviewed Joel McHale and said, "Seattle has the grunge thing, and the coffee thing, and the Sonics. You take one of those away and it isn't the same city." And Joel AGREED with that (love Joel McHale, but dude you got to represent Seattle). Klosty would have torn him UP over that kind of generalization. I've lived her for two years and have never been to a grunge concert (since grunge was pretty over 10-15 years ago). Never had coffee and have been to ONE HALF of one Sonics game. The city seems pretty much the same to me as it was when the Sonics were here. That staement is like saying "Iowa has that day the music died thing, that corn thing, and 6 on 6 girls basketball. Take one of those away and it's not the same state." They took away 6 on 6 girls basketball and I think it made more of an impact than losing the Sonics did to Seattle.

The Roommate got all kinds of sick this weekend so I'm running the library by myself. Really we thought she had malaria for a while.

I'm feeling mostly better, especially in comparison. But still a bit detatched from humanity. Still looking forward to dancing though.

I told the roommate last night I no longer wanted to read books. YA has been really disappointing lately. Just badly written and superficial and false. And I don't know of any adult fiction I want to read. Everything that looks good is about missing teens and I can only read that book so many times. I am totally burst out on abduction fiction.

I want to reread all the plot-driven novels I love. Like Flannagan's Run which I might have sent to Tess. Or the Ruins. But not really the Ruins, because once was enough. It's good though, way better than the movie.

I have to read Epic to compare and contrast for Guys Lit Wire next month. And 2 books for WASHYARG. But thankfully I can put that off because I finally got Lemurs vs. Lizards Round 3. Plot driven and not totally terrible.

After that who knows. I may give up this teen librarian thing and search for other ways to spend my time. Like writing my own not terrible teen fiction.

But probably not.

This is Love 2009. I was there. It was a PLUR party, that's why is has an abbreviated name. I've been to Unity, Respect, and Love. There hasn't been a Peace so far (though there's a second Unity in April). I thought they should have had Peace on Armstice Day, but no one listens to me. Except for...




This dude was also there stealing my look. I INVENTED that look at raves. I'm kinda famous for it. I was looking through the pics and said, "Hey, that's me!" before realizing I wore black to that one.

I hope he can sleep at night, the poseur. I know I can. Mainly because I'm so achy and footsore afterwards.

This was Broken Hearts. I was there. Right behind me? Jimni Cricket! Much to my parents' chagrin I did not ask her to marry me and have raver babies.

And 2 rows in front is DJ Dummy. Which I did not realize until now. He isn't famous or anything, but its neat to see DJs dance to their peers. Noramlly they just hang out in back and do drugs confiscated by security. So I've been told.

I was wearing Zandra's (who is in red next to me) VIP pass because I was supposed to ask Ian K for a CD. Later she talked to him in the bar area and wanted me to come chat, but I did not. PLus he did not give out CDs as promised. I have never actually heard of a VIP actually getting the stuff they were supposed to when they bought VIP tickets.

The other day I was on Amazon and saw there was a new Jack Reacher book coming out... in May. So I immediately went to the library website to put it on hold and found out I was still 97th in line. For a book a LIBRARIAN just found out about. That comes out in MAY.

So I was bummed out about that until I went to the service center and perused their free advance copies. One was called Dean Man's Dust and starred a guy named Joe Hunter. Who solved problems for people who couldn't solve them themselves. With violence. The only way Joe Hunter could be more like Jack Reacher was if his name was Joe Grasper.

Anyway I finished my super slow Stewart O'Nan book (I like him much better when he's writing about cholera) and wanted a change of pace. Joe Hunter is no Jack Reacher though. He is kind of terrible. I got through 5 chapters one of which was about a place called Jubal's Hollow which was kind of ok, one where Joe Grasper beats up a thug named Shank, one where a serial killer slices off an old man's thumbs, and one where Joe Grasper beats up Shank again and shoots him in the knee.

The book even started like the Reacher books with him looking for his wayward brother. The author acknowleged Lee Child in his influences, but there's a difference between influenced by and writting the EXACT SAME BOOK. Except not good. I love the Reacher books because even when they aren't great there is craft apparent in their construction and even when they're repetitive they are fun. This book had no craft, just mindless imitation and bad writing.

So now I'm reading Apt Pupil because Stephen King rocks my socks. And then a bunch of YA prolly. I'm off to a meeting in the service center in a room I'm not sure exists any more.

This is what my blog would look like if I twittered it.

I feel a little bit like I died in the night, but the mouth region is the only part feeling the effects. I think I may have zombie mouth. Another reason to not get up before 7:30.

I'm still holding out hope for BBQ being open. Yesterday I found out there was a place near my house that served BBQ sammiches, but they closed at 5. It's more or a smokehouse/meat shop than a restaurant. But maybe they have turkey sticks.

I miss living next to QFC that often had some sort of turkey offering in their deli. I still live near a QFC, but it isn't nearly as good.

There is signing coming from a children's program in the meeting room. It sounds better than it will later this afternoon when we break out rock band. Less swearing too. I hope.

Martha Stewart did dog yoga on the Soup. I told the Roommate she should look into that. But with the beagle not the terrier (or as I call them Howly and Growly). I had to kick Growly off my bed last night because he's ugly and stinks. He did not appreciate that. And tried to bite me, which I did not appreciate.

My throat has been bothering me lately. My dentist said my tonsils were all swollen and the left side of my tongue seemed swollen and painy the last couple days. Last night I took some super pain meds and they helped, but then put me out at like 10. And then I had a billion strange dreams about delivering refrigerators in Iraq under fire and hanging out in Sultan with their raver kids who wore costumes, and also Tess came to visit where he had a nice chat until we got attacked by bees.

I'm feeling sickish today, but it seemed to happen after I laughed myself into a coughing fit watching the San Francisco auditions of Idol.

I just ran into one of my flamingly gay borderline transgender kids who was in the library with his boyfriend. He introduced us and then showed me the kids neck which was like harvest season on the hickey farm... and the yields were GOOD! Always weird, my kids.

Staff meetings today. Day off tomorrow.

So Bill Simmons is talking to Chuck Klosterman in his latest podcast for like 45 minutes about Chris Webber and Paul Shirley (!) and perception. And Klosterman is just leading this sportscaster around from point to point and kinda embarrassing him on his own podcast. And I'm not sure Bill Simmons even realized it.

And Klosterman doesn't even really follow sports which is even more impressive.

Klosty is super-smart by the way. I used to think I might like to know him because he'd be an interesting friend to have. But I think I'd be totally out of his league as a conversational partner. Dude is head and shoulders above almost anyone I've talked to.

The weirdest part of the whole Klosterman phenomenon, every time I think of him I think of Red Lobster now. So thanks for that!

Sometimes I think I'm smarter than sportswriters. I KNOW I'm smarter than sports commentators. I watch Around the Horn everyday because it helps me relax, sometimes to the point of making me fall asleep. So today they were talking about the Ravens game, which I watched.

So the game was 16-14 in the 4th quarter, Ravens ball on the 40 after a good punt return. The Ravens don't have much offense going and Flacco is not playing bad, but has had about 9 passes dropped by his receivers. On the return a personal foul is called on some idiot Raven and instead of the ball on the 40 and momentum they now have the ball on their own 13.

Ravens run about 3 plays before Flacco throws an interception that is run back for a touchdown. Around the Horn unanimously says Flacco played a bad game and threw 3 interceptions which was the difference. I argued that the personal foul was the cause as it backed the Ravens up so that they were forced into taking chances and THAT led to the interception. That they had no shot at scoring because they just didn't ahve the offense to drive to field goal range from the 13. From the 40, sure.

There were of course a lot of other stories and factors (Ed Reed not playing a very good game... despite someone on Fox saying it was a guaranteed 7 points if he got near the ball which is just a dumb thing to say about a free safety)

Now I don't have to come up with interesting things to say about 10 different subjects every day, but then again I really don't like sports that much. If I was to write about sports I cared about I think i could put out some good stuff.

Anyway kind of bummed about the game, but the Ravens got way farther than anyone expected. Too bad Ray Lewis is old and Rex Ryan got hired by the Jets.

I had no plans today except eating chicken and playing Call of Duty (which I did for about 5 hours). Dr. King would have wanted it that way.

Off to find some brownies.

This was the Tribute to You makeup. I was there.

I feel like I'm reading more since December. That might be because I had 5 plane rides to read on to and fro across the country (but I mainly slept). I know I have a huge pile of books I'm looking forward to reading after I finish with the lemurs and the lizards.

Bodies Left Behind by Jeffery Deaver
This is not A Game by Walter Jon Williams (advance reading copy)
Dewey: the Amazing Library Cat
Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein
Eleventh Man by Ivan Doig
I Know Its Over (for WASHYARG)
Testimony by Anita Shreve
Goldengrove by Francine Prose (audio version narrated by MAMIE GUMER!)

And some other stuff: Stuart O'Nan, Sarah Vowell, Stephen King's new one when it comes out.

I think I'll do more reading this year since the roommate and I retire to our respective corners when she is actually home. We're civil and talk to each other and stuff, but its probably best for the time being to just kind o give each other time andspace to adjust to living together.

Plus I like curling up on the couch with the dogs despite myself.

Mostly moved in in that most of my stuff is out of my car and in the garage and I have a place to sleep. And the wi-fi is working and that is what REALLY matters. That and my DVR which is yet to arrive. Instead of moving stuff yesterday I mainly sat on the couch with the dogs and watched football and read about sentient lemurs fighting sentient lizards. It is only slightly less awesome than it sounds.

I set up TWO computers on the wi-fi in the last couple days which shouldn't have been hard, but kind of was. And I set up my room so that it doesn't feel so tiny. And I still had time to make chili and go to a rave and work half a day and watch 3 football games. Life without a DVR is different, but maybe not worse.

Except I'm missing around the horn.

Work remains work-like but now without our old security guard and the old british lady. Apparently they got their comeuppance for insulting me and the teens.

I was just reading a Parks and Rec survey my boss sent me (see I do work) and at the end it asked participants to list their ethnicity. Among the responses were Norweigan (and while I''m like 70% Norweigan I'm not sure I've ever identified myself as 'other' on a survey because of it), Italian, and Chi-talian. Chi-talian makes me laugh.

That is about all from here. Might get to take off early and move some more stuff and unpack.

One of my kids just told me apropos of nothing, that I was a "good employee." And then I came back to my desk and started to journal. And then I figured out that I was supposed to be on the reference desk 15 minutes before.

So the big library news is that our street kids Atomic and Peanut Butter ended up getting arrested for grand theft auto over new years. Thankfully they did this in California so it was outside our jurisdiction. They are in jail till they're 18. But they're the talk of the library so that's something. I don't even feel like I failed them in some way. They are just idiots.

My boss invented some strange weekly schedule so even though I worked Sunday I only work 5 days. But that means like 11 hour days for some reason. So I'm here from 10 to 9 today. That seems like a punishment. I'd rather take my 3.5 hours of vacation I think and keep things to a manageable 8. Specially since I'm moving at the end of the week.

A CSG and I went to Benjamin Button Saturday night at 10:30 and it lasted well into Sunday. It was a 3 hour movie in which a boat sank, but I expect a much larger boat if I'm going to sit watching something for that long. I'm very glad I didn't try to make it a double feature.

I start packing in earnest tomorrow. And go to the dentist. And CPK.

Here's a top ten.

Paper Towns-John Green
Scourge of God-S.M. Stirling
Soon I Will Be Invincible-Austin Grossman
Pale Horse Coming-Stephen Hunter
Audrey, Wait!-Robin Benway
Little Brother-Cory Doctrow
Boy Toy-Barry Lyga
World Made By Hand-James Howard Kunstler
Playing With Matches-Brian Karcher
Dogface-Joe Gargaliola


Honorable Mentions to 20th Century Ghosts (mainly for the story Best New Horror) by Joe Hill and Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks by E. Lockhart and Hunger Games by Stephanie Collins.

First Book read: San Andreas-Alastair MacLean

Last book read: Needful Things-Stephen King

I only read or listened to 115 books this year. That's a down year for me. It's also weird since I'm blogging for one website, reading for a YA Lit group and read for a Mock Printz award. I think I've got a New Year's resolution.

I put these lists together to remind myself what I really liked each year because my preferences are so different than most year end lists.

My favorite albums of 2008 were:

Mayday Parade- A Lesson in Romantics (favorite track: When I get Home You're So Dead)
Augustana-Can't Love, Can't Hurt (Fave: Sweet and Low)
DJ Bouncy-2008 mix (Fave: Total Eclipse of the Heart)
DJ Bouncy- Bubble Bounce (Fave: 4Ever)
Sherwood-A Different Light (Fave: Middle of the Night)
Jack's Mannequin-Glass Passenger (Fave: Crashing)
DJ Bouncy-Again! (Fave: Hero)
Motion City Soundtrack-Even if it Kills Me (Fave: Calling All Cops)


My favorite songs of 2008:

I'll Be Waiting-Ian K. feat Sarah
Secretly Cruel (Double Virgo cover)-Double Virgo
That's Not my Name-Ting Tings
Oh My God-Technoboy feat. Shayla
One Week of Danger-The Virgins
Say-John Meyer
Untouched-The Veronicas
San Fransisco Radio-Global Deejays
Insurance?-The Higher
Here Goes Nothing-Treaty of Paris
See You Again/7 Things-Miley Cyrus
FTS-DJ Wheelz
Sex on Fire-Kings of Leon
We Interrupt this Programme-Coburn
If You're Into It-Flight of the Conchords

Honorable Mentions: Planning a Prison Break-The Receiving End of Sirens; Bleed it Out-Linkin Park, Medicine-The Fold; All Over You-Spill Canvas

Best show of 2008: All Time Low, Mayday Parade, The Maine and Every Avenue at El Corazon. Not that there was a whole lot of competition this year. Global Deejays at Studio 7 was pretty good if that counts.

Favorite DJ discoveries: Bouncy (of course), Ian K, Wheelz, and Hyperfunk.

Biggest Disappointments:

Folie A Deux-Fall Out Boy; Deliverance-Quietdrive; No Really, I'm Fine-Spill Canvas